We Hope They Weigh Their Options Better Next Time

I am a full-time wheelchair user due to cerebral palsy. I am able to stand and walk with assistance, but I’m unable to balance on my stiff and wobbly legs alone. I have a… complicated… relationship with gravity.

At my most recent physical, they need to weigh me. Fine. They have a wheelchair-accessible scale, so I can just roll right on, but I don’t know the weight of my chair for them to subtract. Instead of doing the reasonable thing — put me in an office chair and weigh my wheelchair, then put me back in the wheelchair, weigh me and the chair, and do the d*** math — they decide to have me stand on the scale.

There are grab bars, so I get upright and positioned for the weigh-in, holding on for dear life while putting all my weight on my feet.

The scale shows an error. Joy.

Nurse: “Let go of the bar.”

We try again, and I try desperately to stay upright under my own power. I grab the bar again to keep from falling, and the scale throws another error.

For the third try, I just drop down into a four-point crouch.

Me: “Let’s try it this way.”

The scale (finally!) got a reading. I climbed back into my wheelchair and spent the next several minutes just sucking air because all that activity triggered an asthma attack.