Tipped For Some Payback

A customer has been hanging out at our restaurant for almost three hours having dinner with her friend. We are slow, and they are very cool and chatty with me, sharing that they haven’t seen each other for over twenty years. They enjoy the food and service.

All is going well.

When they are finally ready to leave:

Customer: “I’ll be paying the entire bill.”

It is about 230-something dollars. When I turn the handheld to her on the tip screen, she very politely and properly says:

Customer: “Not this time, darling. Another time.”

A few seconds later, her card is declined.

I politely try to assist while laughing my a** off on the inside. I ask her to check if her bank has contacted her, yadda yadda yadda, the usual lines I give to avoid customers being embarrassed when this happens. I am overly sweet — sickeningly so.

Customer: “Can I go get you the cash and come back? I don’t have any on me.”

Me: “Not this time, darling. Another time.”

She had to grovel to her friend to pay.