Putting You On The Burner Now

I don’t cook very often; I only ever use the stove to make grilled cheese sandwiches. I have my own personal frying pans for this purpose. When I finish making the sandwich, I always leave the pan on the stove, but on the exact opposite burner, so that I can safely cool it down.

One day, my dad comes downstairs while I’m on the computer and starts pitching a fit at me. He scolds me for leaving a burner on. He’s burned his hand trying to get my pan away from it and turn it off. I’m confused; not only did I turn the burner off before I left — I’m not that stupid — but I always put the pan on the opposite end of the stove from the burner I used, just in case. I hate being blamed for things I didn’t do, so we end up getting into a pretty big shouting match over it.

Later on, he comes back down to apologize; the idiot who turned the burner on and left it unattended was my mom.