If They Won’t Use Their Brain, Use Your Mouth

I work in a supermarket, and I’m still wearing a mask in 2023. A little paranoid, I know, but most of my family works in healthcare. Whenever customers ask me why I still have one, I tell them…

Me: “Oh, I’m extremely vulnerable, and I’ve caught it twice already. I don’t fancy round three.”

And 98% of customers are cool at best, or they give that weird “awww, poor disabled person, awwww” pity at nearly worst. There are a handful of people around who laugh about how I’m still a slave to “all that hysteria“, for whom I’ve discovered a far better reply.

Me: “Oh, I don’t have a mouth. I find that tends to scare customers’ kids.”

They’re either too scared or confused and drop it.