Dealing With Family Ain’t No Pleasure Cruise

For my mother- and father-in-law’s thirtieth anniversary, my husband and his siblings all chipped in to get them a seven-day cruise in a nice room with a balcony — very expensive! The kids have always had a rough relationship with their mother, but now that everyone has moved out, she has been more invested in staying connected.

Mother-In-Law: “This is wonderful! I can’t wait!”

Father-In-Law: “Thank you all.”

[Mother-In-Law] walks off, already on her phone.

Mother-In-Law: “Yes, a cruise! How sweet of them.” *Pauses* “Oh I don’t think that’s a problem. Let me see. [Father-In-Law], what do you think about [Woman] coming on the cruise?”

Father-In-Law: “Sure. That’s fine.”

Mother-In-Law: “What do you guys think?”

The kids all nod, not knowing who this woman is.

Mother-In-Law: “Great!”

We all leave, happy that they are happy. A few weeks before the cruise, [Mother-In-Law] sends a mass text to everyone involved in purchasing her cruise ticket.

Mother-In-Law: “[Woman] wants to know what her room number is.”

Sibling #1: “It probably isn’t assigned yet.”

Mother-In-Law: “Oh, okay. She is so excited! She’s bringing her kids and her parents.”

Husband: “We’re glad you’re going to have fun!”

On the day of the cruise, there’s another text from [Mother-In-Law]. 

Mother-In-Law: “They can’t find [Woman]’s reservation. What is the confirmation number?”

Sibling #2: “It should be in the email.”

Mother-In-Law: “What email?”

Sibling #2: “From the cruise line.”

Mother-In-Law: “She never got one.”

Husband: “When did she book?”

Mother-In-Law: “It was whenever you booked for her.”

Sibling #1: “Why would we do that?”

Husband: “We aren’t paying for a whole random family to go on a cruise. You’re joking.”

[Mother-In-Law] calls [Husband]. 

Mother-In-Law: “I asked if they could come along, and you all said yes!”

Husband: “…Because they can go, but we aren’t paying for it. We never said we would, and you never asked in the first place.”

Mother-In-Law: “This is so embarrassing. I was trying to take my friend on a nice, relaxing trip, and now she can’t go?!”

Husband: “I don’t know what to tell you, Mom. We never said we would pay for them.”

Mother-In-Law: “This is ridiculous!”

She hung up. Her friend and family could not get on the cruise because it was all booked.

That was the last time my husband and his siblings did anything nice for his parents. [Father-In-Law] was grateful for the vacation, though he was stuck on a boat with an ungrateful woman for a week. They divorced a few years later.