My husband and I have two children, both boys, now aged eleven and fourteen. My husband’s younger sister now has three children, a daughter (aged seven) and two sons (aged three and five).

The year my youngest son was turning four, he asked for a birthday party. He was not yet in school, so he did not know anyone but family, and there were no children other than his brother who were able to attend. 

Luckily, his favorite people in the world are Grandpa and Grandma (Dad’s parents). Grandma is like a big kid. She’s super fun and energetic. She acts much like a kid herself, and my boys adore her.

I knew they were very busy, so I asked them several months in advance if they could attend his birthday party. The party was to be ON his birthday (this is important). Being the wonderful grandparents they are, they agreed and requested time off from their jobs. We also invited all close-by family, including my sister-in-law. 

Months go by, and it’s now about a week and a half before my son’s big day. I’ve bought the decorations, planned the menu, and pumped him up. I like to sing a “Final Countdown” song as I prepare breakfast in the morning.

One afternoon, I receive a call from my sister-in-law, who is about to find out the sex of her baby. She’s pregnant with baby number one. She wants to plan a gender reveal party, but she’s called her friends and family and discovered that most work and can’t attend without several weeks’ notice for their jobs. 

The ONLY day everyone just so happens to have off is my son’s birthday.

Sister-In-Law: “Would you be willing to move your son’s birthday party to another day so I can have my party?”

At this point, it may bear mentioning that she already has three baby showers planned and has asked me to make the food (out of pocket) for one of the showers. Most people being asked to attend her gender reveal party were already attending multiple baby showers for her.

I am pretty friendly and passive, but this caught me very off guard.

Me: *Gently.* “My son is looking forward to this, and we’ve had it planned for months, which is WHY everyone had the day off from work.”

She feigned sympathy but still urged me to please move my son’s birthday party to a time that everyone could attend later and let her have this open date for her party.

Sister-In-Law: “It’s my first baby, while you’ve already had two. Besides, [Youngest Son] loves babies and would want to go to my party too! He could still come to my party and see everyone he loves and then get to do it all over again when everyone can request time off!”

I didn’t have time to gather a response as she steamrolled over me.

Me: “Okay? If they want to go, I won’t make them come to [Youngest Son]’s party, but I can’t go to your party. We have plans.”

Sister-In-Law: “Thanks!”

I was angry. She had pulled this kind of thing with other people before, but she had always really loved my boys and never tried this with me, or not to this extreme, anyway.

I didn’t know how to react other than to vent to my husband (her brother), who wasn’t surprised at all and said not to worry and that their dad would set her straight.

Funny enough, I was talking to my husband when I saw my father-in-law calling my phone. I answered, and he said:

Father-In-Law: “[Sister-In-Law] told me you had no problem with her hijacking your son’s birthday and that you had insisted she have the party and everyone go to that one instead of [Youngest Son]’s. If this is true, I’ll attend her party, but I would way rather go to [Youngest Son]’s party. I’ve already gotten presents, and we’re excited about celebrating a kid who’s already here ON his big day.”

I very happily told him:

Me: “I was NEVER going to cancel his birthday or make him sit through someone else’s party on his big day. I mean, he’s four, and I’ve been counting down for him every morning. What kind of monster would I be?! I told [Sister-In-Law] that people could go to that if they preferred, but that we wouldn’t be attending.”

Father-In-Law: “That sounds about right. I’ll be going to [Youngest Son]’s party since I’ve requested time off for that. If she wants another party on another day, she needs to give him notice.”

She cancelled (or never organized?) the party and then talked about me behind my back to anyone who would listen for years afterward.

My wife and I are visiting her family for a weekend (her grandma’s eightieth birthday). We drove in from New York.

Brother-In-Law: “How are things over in Sharia town?”

Me: “Huh?”

Brother-In-Law: “Now that you got that terrorist mayor?”

Me: “Our Muslim mayor is doing just fine, thank you.”

Brother-In-Law: “So you’re a communist now?”

Me: “I’m not anything, but the term you’re looking for is democratic socialist.”

Brother-In-Law: “All the same s***! Hey, vote however you want, but do you really want your taxes paying for others?”

Me: “My taxes already pay for your Medicaid, so what’s the difference?”

That wasn’t the right thing to say, as [Brother-In-Law] started shouting, defending his need for Medicaid, and was eventually told to “shut the f*** up” by grandma as her birthday wish.

My mother-in-law is visiting for a week. We get along pretty well, and I like her firecracker personality.

The first morning she’s visiting, after breakfast, we see her putting her shoes on and getting ready to leave.

Husband: “Where are you going?”

Mother-In-Law: “Shopping! I don’t come to the city often, and I want to buy some nice clothes.”

Husband: “Oh, I thought you might want to spend the day with your grandchildren.”

Mother-In-Law: “Plenty of time this week for that.”

Husband: “Oh, but [My Name] and I needed to go do some things, and…”

Mother-In-Law: “So you wanted me to stay here alone with the kids as a free babysitter?”

I’m laughing because I know that’s what my husband was thinking, and his silence is proving his guilt.

Mother-In-Law: “Thought so. Look, I’m here on vacation! I’m not here to put socks on centipedes!”

She puts her last shoe on and opens the door.

Mother-In-Law: “My Uber is here. I’ll be back in time for dinner. Have a nice day with your children!”

Mad props to her; she knows what she wants and how to get it. She did spend plenty of time with our two boys that week, but she wanted a “me-day” on her vacation, and as a mother myself, I totally get it.

CORRECTION: Inconsistent character title has been corrected.

The last name in the story has been changed for privacy. 

I worked with one of my boyfriend’s cousins over the time we were engaged, and for a bit after we were married. She’s not a terrible person, but she has overly strong family ties that border on creepy, in my opinion, but then some families are closer-knit than mine. 

At one of my bridal showers, we were discussing doing an outing as ladies in the next few weeks, and I mentioned how I would need to get off work. Usually, we could not be off at the same time, so she said:

Cousin-In-Law: “Well, since I am a true Wilson, I should be the one allowed to get off work for this because it’s my family.”

No one blinked an eye. My mother was rightfully horrified that someone would say this to my face and was about to throw hands until I told her:

Me: “It’s happened before and being quiet is the best way to deal with it.”

This statement was made multiple times over the course of our engagement, where she informed me I would “never be a true Wilson”. One day I snapped and looked her dead in the eyes after she said it and stated:

Me: “Well, at least my children that I birth will be true Wilsons; yours won’t.”

I have never heard her say I’m not a true Wilson again.

I get a call from my mother-in-law:

Mother-In-Law: “My Outlook is no longer downloading my emails!”

Me: “What is it doing?”

Mother-In-Law: “Nothing! Come and fix it!”

Me: “No messages or anything popping up?”

Mother-In-Law: “Nothing! Come and fix it!”

I sigh and once again curse the fact that my family sees me as free tech support because I helped install someone’s printer once.

I go to my in-law’s house and ask my mother-in-law to show me what she’s doing. There was an error message as Outlook started, but she dismissed it before I could read it.

Me: “Okay, restart Outlook and this time don’t click the ‘OK’ button so I can read the message.”

The message said that her version of Outlook was no longer compatible with Gmail and would not be able to connect, as well as what steps to take to continue to use Gmail with Outlook.

I just gave her a disappointed look and walked away, with the error message still on the screen.

Mother-In-Law: “Don’t you give me that look!”

Me: “Why? That’s the look you always give me.”

Mother-In-Law: “I asked you for your help!”

Me: “I already did, by making you read the message on screen, the one you said wasn’t popping up. It literally told you it wasn’t going to work and told you how to fix it, and you ignored it.”

I went home after that to fix dinner for my kids. Apparently, she called my husband after I left because he came home laughing, saying, “So you made my mom mad by forcing her to read?”