Camping Out Is Out

(My group of friends and I are all very experienced outdoorsmen so our camping trips are really roughing it: typically, we take a six-or-so-mile hike with minimal equipment so we can live off of the land as much as possible. My friend’s new girlfriend decides she wants to come with us. She shows up the day of the trip with four bags, including things like a hairdryer.)

Me: “Why are you bringing all this? Didn’t [Friend] tell you to pack light?”

Girl: “Well, I did. I only brought the stuff I need.”

Me: “Uh, not really. You don’t even have any food.”

Girl: “I’ll just go to a restaurant or something.”

(After we arrive in the mountains to begin our hike up:)

Girl: “Where are the cabins?”

Me: “There aren’t any.”

Girl: “Then where are we staying?”

Me: “In the woods, about seven miles that way.”

Girl: *Pause* “Are you kidding?”

Me: “Nope. I thought [Friend] told you we were camping?”

Girl: “He did. I just thought he was kidding about being out in the woods. Like, we would be in cabins like summer camp.”

(That was her last camping trip.)

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