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Bad boss and coworker stories

Deep Ditz Pizza

| Working | September 21, 2012

(I am trying to order a pizza for a party I am having. A college-aged employee is taking my order.)

Me: “One meat lovers and one extra cheese. Make them both larges, please.”

Employee: “Okay, so one large cheese. Is that everything?”

Me: “No, I need a meat lovers and an extra cheese.”

Employee: “Oh, why didn’t you say that? $28.50.”

Me: “Don’t you need my name?”

Employee: “Oh, yes. I almost forgot!”

Me: “Smith. You know how to spell that, right?”

Employee: “Oh, yes. Now I need your name.”

Me: “I just told you.”

Employee: “Oh.”

Me: “How long will it be?”

Employee: “I don’t know.”

Me: “Can you find out?”

Employee: “Yes.” *yells to her coworkers* “How long for two pies?!” *pauses for an answer, which I can’t hear* “Okay!” *to me* “I found out!” *hangs up*

I Think We Can Man-age

| Working | September 21, 2012

(I’m a woman working with two of my male coworkers. Note that all the female employees have or are studying towards a university degree.)

Male Coworker: “It’s so annoying that [boss] is coming in today to cash up. Why can’t one of us just do it?”

Me: “Well, has he taught you how to do it?”

Male Coworker: “Well, no, but how hard can it be?” [Female Coworker #1] and [Female Coworker #2] can both do it.”

Me: “Well, yeah, it makes sense that he teaches them to do it since they work full-time. One of them is almost always here if [boss] isn’t working.”

Male Coworker: “Fine, but I’m smarter than them! He should teach me to do it!”

Me: “What makes you think you’re smarter than them?”

Male Coworker: “They’re women! Of course you wouldn’t understand.”

Me: *sarcastically* “We also got into university and actually do our jobs well, so I guess there’s that.”

Male Coworker: “Like I said, you wouldn’t understand!”

When Customer Service Is Just Lip Service

| Working | September 20, 2012

(We are a clothing store chain. I get a call from a customer.)

Customer: “Hi, I was in your store last week. I think I left my lipstick in the fitting room.”

Me: “Your lipstick?”

Customer: “I can’t find it anywhere. Then, I remembered that I spilled my purse in your fitting room. The lipstick might have gotten left behind.”

Me: “Well, we do save some belongings that get left behind. Let me check for you…”

(While I’m checking, the manager walks over.)

Manager: “What are you looking for?”

Me: “A lady may have left a lipstick in the fitting room last week.”

Manager: “I know that lipstick! I hate it when people leave stuff lying around! I graffitied some bathroom wall with it, and then threw it away! That should teach people to not leave things. I found it and did what I wanted with it!”

Trash Does Not Equal Cache

| Working | September 20, 2012

(Note: I work for an IT department of a manufacturing company. I am going around to employee’s PCs and upgrading their e-mail clients.)

Me: “Okay, I’m just upgrading your e-mail client. It shouldn’t take too long.”

Employee: “Will I have to back my mail up?”

Me: “No, your folders will still remain there after the upgrade.”

Employee: “No worries. I’ll leave you to it.”

(I have to close down the old client before I can upgrade it. By default, upon closing it asks if you want to clear the trashcan. I select “Yes” and then upgrade the client.)

Me: “Okay, all done. See you later.”

(Five minutes later, the staff calls me up.)

Employee: “Where has my email gone? I’ve lost emails.”

Me: “Which folders? I can see all your folders are still there.”

Employee: “There were emails in my trash can, and now they are gone!”

Me: “By default, when you close down the client it asks you if you want to clear the trash. This is what I did before the upgrade.”

Employee: “But I file emails in that folder that I don’t want to delete!”

Me: *facepalm*

A Queso By Any Other Name

| Working | September 20, 2012

(I am calling my local retail store to ask if they have an item in stock.)

Employee #1: “Hello, thanks for calling [national company]. How can I help you?”

Me: “Yes, I was wondering if you could check if you guys sell quesadilla makers. If so, do you have any in stock?”

Employee #1: *rudely* “…A WHAT?!”

Me: “A quesadilla maker?”

Employee #1: “Oh, well, I will have to transfer you to Housewares. Please hold…”

(I sit on hold for about 3 minutes before another employees comes on the phone.)

Employee #2: “Housewares, how can I help you?”

Me: “Yes, hello… can you tell me if you carry quesadilla makers and if so, do you have any in stock?”

Employee #2: “…A what?”

Me: “A quesadilla maker.”

Employee #2: “…A WHAT?!”

Me: “Quesadilla maker.”

Employee #2: “Lady, I do not know what you are saying. Can you say it slow?!”

Me: “A… quesadilla… maker. You put tortillas in with some kind of cheese and sauce, close the top, and let it cook.”

Employee #2: “Oh, let me check…”

(I sit on hold for a few more minutes.)

Employee #2: “Sorry, lady, we don’t carry those things. We only have this round thing that opens and closes. You put tortillas inside, close it, and when you open it, it makes little triangle pieces.”

Me: *gives up* “Okay, thanks anyway.”

(I went to the physical store 20 minutes later and found the “round thing that opens and closes” by myself.)