Bad boss and coworker stories

One Order Of Nepotism To-Go

, | Working | May 26, 2012

(It’s about 10 at night, and I stop at a drive-thru for a late dinner. There are no cars behind me in line, so I take a few moments to examine the new items on the menu.)

Me: “Could I have a few seconds to look at the menu?”

Employee #1: *via the drive-thru intercom* “Lady, just order already!”

Me: “Fine…” *I place an order and pull up*

Employee #1: “You really should keep your f***ing a** going to keep the line moving.”

Me: “There was no one else here. No one was behind me.”

Employee #1: *shrugs and waves me forward*

(As I pull forward to get my food, I complain to the girl with my order.)

Employee #2: *sighs* “Yeah, you’re the third person to complain tonight. He’s the manager’s son, so I don’t think anything’s going to be done about it…”

(Needless to say, I never went to that particular franchise again.)

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Building Morale Vs. Building Bikes

| Working | May 25, 2012

(We have a regional manager who would sometimes drop by and try to motivate us to build more bikes faster. The thing is, while he is a decent manager, he did not know much about the actual bikes. Usually, bikes take anywhere from 45 minutes to an hour and a half to build, depending on the bike.)

Manager: “So, I see there are a few holes on the racks. Are you guys trying to fill them?”

Coworker: “Yeah, the builder is working on those. I will help once I get done with today’s repairs.”

Manager: “Well, it shouldn’t take that long. I did one once, and it only took like a half an hour!” *leaves*

Coworker: *to me* “Yeah, he built one alright—except it fell apart on the first day and was returned right after that. Took me a few hours to fix all his mistakes! We never told him.”

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I’ll Take This Shift To-Go, Please

, | Working | May 25, 2012

(I walk into a fast food restaurant. Note that I’m standing right in front of the server as I place my order at the counter.)

Worker: “That will be $14.35. Please drive to the 1st window.”

Me: *staring blankly*

Worker: *realizes what she just said* “Oh! That’s $14.35!”

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Ron Paul Retribution

| Working | May 25, 2012

(I used to be a volunteer for Ron Paul, but I missed the deadline to switch party registrations and vote in the Republican Primary because I was having brain surgery. On Election Day, they call me.)

Caller: “Is [my name] there?”

Me: “That’s me.”

Caller: “Hi. I’m calling with the Ron Paul campaign. Have you voted yet today?”

Me: “Sorry, I missed the deadline to switch parties because I was having brain surgery.”

Caller: “If you’re going to make excuses for not voting, make it something not so serious!”

Me: “No, really. That’s my excuse. I was having brain surgery to remove a benign tumor and the deadline came and went. So, I’m still a Democrat.”

Caller: “It would have been easy to fill out a little form.”

Me: “I had a lot on my plate, okay?”

Caller: “You’re not a very good Ron Paul supporter, are you?”

Me: *click*

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Meow-rons Give Im-purr-fect Advice

| Working | May 24, 2012

(My cat has recently developed a rather unusual habit. The local pet shop has so-called “cat experts” on staff, so I got to talk to them to figure out if this habit is a problem.)

Me: “Hi, are you one of the cat experts?”

Employee: “Yes, ma’am! What can I do for you?”

Me: “So, my cat has been doing something kind of funny lately. I don’t really think it’s something that is that big a deal, but I want to make sure that it isn’t going to cause him any problems.”

Employee: “I’ll be the judge of that. What’s she doing?”

Me:He. He has been burying spiders alive in his litter box. I’m thinking it’s harmless, but I have found poisonous spiders in the house. So, I’m a little concerned about him getting bitten because he eats them sometimes, too.”

Employee: “She what?”

Me:He. My cat is a boy. He eats spiders. And sometimes buries them alive in his litter box.”

Employee: “You’ve got to stop her! She can’t do that. It’s for POOPIES!”

Me: “Right…he knows that’s what it’s for, that’s what he mostly uses it for. But when he catches spiders that he doesn’t eat, he buries them alive. I don’t think it’s a huge problem, I just want to make sure that it won’t create a health risk for him. I know it’s unlikely but since cat litter is designed to trap moisture I wanted to make sure it wasn’t going to trap toxins from any potentially poisonous arachnids that could get into his system.”

Employee: “Cat litter traps moisture?”

Me: “Is there someone else I can talk to?”

Employee: “Look, whatever reason she’s doing this, you need to get your cat to stop. Spiders are GROSS anyway!”

(I ended up finding another employee to “help” me. Their suggestion? My cat needed to see a shrink.)

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