(My family has been receiving frequent calls from a scammer telling us we have viruses on our computer. Today, the phone rings and my dad picks up.)

Dad: “Hello?”

Dad: “Okay, how about this: I’ll throw my computer out the window, into the firepit, and I’ll burn it. Will that work? That’ll work, right?”

Dad: “No, see I’m just gonna throw out my computer and burn it. That way the virus will be gone, right?”

Dad: “Well, I just burned my computer! It’s gone! So, the virus should be gone, too, and I have nothing to worry about, right?”

Dad: “Well, see, I don’t need a computer. I just like to use my cell phone, and a typewriter, and an abacus. Because computers are evil! Like you!”

(The scammer hung up on him.)

(I am a new hire, and have been told to stand around and observe everyone. So I do. A server comes in. Note: this restaurant is very upscale.)

Server: “Some little kids want something to eat. I suggested carrot sticks and they said all right.”

Head Chef: “Okay, I’ll cut some carrots up.”

(He took some carrots, washed them, took a knife, and started to cut them up into fourths. He did a messy job; several carrots fell to the dirty floor. He picked them up, put them BACK on the plate, and continued. This was in full view of the manager, who saw this and frowned, but said nothing. The plate went to the server, who served the kids. I was horrified, but felt it was not in my place to say anything. However, my expression must’ve given me away, because later the manager said that he didn’t feel that I was right for that restaurant. I agreed!)

(I am training a new cashier. He has yet to learn most of the produce codes, so he often looks them up in an alphabetical list provided to us. The list can be somewhat confusing, as something like “red peppers” would be listed as “peppers, red,” and so on. He comes upon red onions.)

New Cashier: “Are these under ‘R’ for red or ‘U’ for onion?”

(I’m not sure how long he’ll last.)

(I go to the local pizza place.)

Me: *places order*

Cashier: “Okay, will there be anything else?”

Me: “Nope.”

Cashier: “May I have a name?”

Me: *gives name*

Cashier: “Is it for here or to go?”

Me: “For here.”

Cashier: “Will there be anything else?”

Me: “You already asked that.”

Cashier: “I’m sorry; I meant, can I have a name?”

Me: “You already asked that as well.”

Cashier: *laughing from embarrassment* “I’m sorry. I meant is that for here or to go?”

Me: *face-palming at this point* “Again, you already asked that. You are just repeating yourself.”

Cashier: “I’m so sorry. I’ve had a really long day.”

(I am trying to buy a scratch ticket and because I look my age I’m often asked for my ID. Because I got my driver’s license before I turned 19, it says on the license of the year I turned 19.)

Cashier: “So you’re not 19 until April…”

Me: *confused* “No, I’m 20 in…”

Cashier: *confused look*

Me: “I was born in 1996.”

Cashier: “S***, forgot it’s 2016.”

(So not only did she get my birth month wrong, but also the year, and the fact I needed to be only 18 to buy a scratch ticket. Impressive.)