Two Of Nine

(Like many other people, I get spam phone calls. I’ve been trying to get off their lists, and it’s clear that the automated systems aren’t working, so I’ve been trying to tell the persons on the other end verbally. It’s worked for a couple of callers, but certainly not all of them. One of the common ones is talking about my current credit card account. I’ve been getting it since well before I had a credit card. They ask me to press nine to speak with an agent, which for this one I’m not particularly interested in doing. I’ve had automated systems claim to put me on a list if I pressed two before, even if that wasn’t a stated option, so I try that. It instead starts the phone ringing, so I figure I’ll just tell them to take me off and be done with it.)

Scammer: *in a very obvious Indian accent* “Hello, can I get your name, please?”

Me: “No. Please take me off your call list.”

Scammer: “I will not take you off my call list.”

Me: *thinking I misheard* “What?”

Scammer: “I will not take you off my call list!”

Me: “Uh, yes, you will take me off your call list.”

Scammer: “No, sir, I will not!”

Me: “Yes!”

Scammer: *in a somewhat sing-songy way* “No-no-no-no-no! I will not take you off my list!”

Me: “Why not?”

Scammer: “Because I don’t want to!”

Me: “Are you kidding me?”

(We continue to go in circles for a bit. Admittedly, I’m being a bit stubborn but this is the first time they’ve outright said no. After a bit he changes up his tactic:)

Scammer: “You pressed nine, sir!”

Me: “No, I did not.”

Scammer: “Yes, you did.”

Me: “No. I pressed two hoping that it would take me off your list.”

Scammer: *sing-song again* “No-no-no-no-no!”

(He was persistent but so was I. Eventually, I stopped responding and just left the line open, which seemed to finally wear him down. He tried asking for my name, and I simply repeated my demand without giving it, at which point he finally said he’d taken the name off his list. I didn’t really believe him, but I knew I was not going to get anywhere by taking it further, so I hung up. I still don’t know what he hoped to accomplish, though. Did he think I was going to suddenly start complying if he said he wasn’t going to take me off his list?)