Suffering From Tissue Damage

(It is 6:30 in the morning. I’m sweeping the aisles when I run into a coworker being berated by a rather unfriendly-looking customer. I go over to help.)

Me: “Is there anything I can help you with, ma’am?”

Customer: “Hopefully. This girl doesn’t seem to know what she’s doing.”

Me: *smiling, trying not to freak out* “What can I help you find today?”

(She pulls out an ad from her purse and points.)

Customer: “I’m looking for this box of tissues.”

(My coworker had found the aisle with tissues on it, and correctly pointed to the right box, a 90-count tissue box from a generic brand. I show the customer that these are the tissues she’s looking for, the same ones shown in the ad. The customer then gets furious with both of us.)

Customer: “I want to speak to someone who knows what they’re doing!”

(Our manager isn’t in that early, so I just get a checker with higher authority. I bring her over to the customer, and again the customer points to our ad.)

Customer: “I’m looking for this!” *angrily jabs finger at picture in ad* “This box of tissues! Is that too much to ask for?!”

(The checker then calmly looks at the ad and shows the customer the box count, and shows the box selection of tissues to the customer that is on sale. The customer then starts freaking out, yelling at all three of us, and saying how terrible we are at our jobs. At this point she’s screaming and saying she “wants this box, and this COLOR, because it matches her decor.” All three of us have an “ah-ha” moment, so to speak. She wants these tissues, but also the color in the ad, which is, as most of us know, out of our control.)

Checker: “Yes, that is too much to ask for.” *smiles, then walks away*

(The customer, beyond furious by now, leaves her cart and screams as she walks away.)

Customer: “I’m never shopping here again!”

(All that, over tissues. Needless to say, I saw that same customer about a month later.)