Me: “[Firm]. How can I help you?”
Caller: “Yes I’m calling for [Attorney].”
Me: “Sorry, he is not available.”
Caller: “Do you know when he might be available? I have a meeting with him later today.”
Me: “Sorry, I can’t say when that will be.”
Caller: “What, is it a secret?”
Me: “No, I DO NOT KNOW when he will be available.”
Caller: “Oh, okay! Thanks, honey.”
(It’s a very busy day, as it’s the end of Ramadan. Lots of Muslim customers are here, and as expected, they find quiet corners to do their prayers in. I’m walking inside and see a customer berating one of the men.)
Customer: “Keep your [slur] religion at home! This is a good Christian establishment they have kindly let you in!”
Me: “Sir, please stop!”
Customer: “You! Kick this d*** n***** out!”
Me: “I’m asking YOU to leave. This man has done nothing to you.”
Customer: “He’s f**** rubbing his terrorist religion in my face! He’s probably gonna blow this place up! Him and his [slur] family!”
Me: “I’m asking you one more time to leave, before I call security.”
Customer: “Yeah, call them! Kick this [slur] out and arrest him!”
(I call security. The Muslim man tries walking away, but the other customer grabs his arm and pulls him back.)
Customer: “NO, YOU DON’T! You’re gonna go detonate your f**** bomb or something! Your a** stays here where I can keep people safe!”
Me: “Sir, please do not touch him! He has done nothing to you or anyone else!”
Customer: “HE’S GONNA KILL YOU!”
(At this point, lots of people are staring and backing away. The Muslim man looks frightened, but doesn’t move. Security pushes through the crowd.)
Customer: “Thank f***** God you’re here! This [slur] was gonna blow the whole place up!”
Security: “You’re gonna have to come with me.”
Customer: “What?! Why?! He’s the one that’s gonna blow us up!”
(Security drags the screaming customer away. I turn to the other man.)
Me: “I’m very, very sorry about that! Are you all right?”
Muslim Customer: “Yes, I’m fine, thank you. And thank you for standing up for me.”
(The Muslim man had his tickets given to him for free. The customer who had attacked him was banned for life.)
(I work in the customer service sector of a call centre for a well-known bank in the UK. I am working a later shift and it’s almost nine pm when an elderly gentleman calls.)
Customer: “Hi there, I’d like to order an alarm call.”
Me: “An alarm call… What exactly do you mean by that, sir?”
Customer: “You know, an alarm call! Like, you call me at a certain time?”
Me: “All right… is the call to discuss anything in particular to do with your bank account? Are you looking to make an appointment within a branch today?”
Customer: *getting frustrated* “NO, I just want you to call me at nine o’clock tomorrow morning to wake me up!”
Me: “Sir, that’s not a service we offer. Are you aware you’ve phoned the bank?”
Customer: “Yes! And it is a service you USED to offer. Why don’t you do it anymore?”
Me: “I can assure you that we have never ever offered an ‘alarm call’ service.”
Customer: “You’re bloody useless; I’ll try my other bank.”
(Please note I am a young worker, whilst the patron is an elderly lady with her daughter; both appear angry. It is a sunny Sunday afternoon.)
Customer: “Coffee, and this voucher.”
(Hands over a voucher for a free cup of coffee, not valid on Sundays, which is clearly stated on the back.)
Myself: “I’m awfully sorry, ma’am, but this voucher isn’t available on Sundays.”
Customer: “Well, then, you are breaking the law!”
Myself: *unsure how to respond* “I’m sorry?”
Customer: *points to dates that voucher is available, next to where it states not on Sundays* “YOU have put the dates here and YOU are breaking the law by not allowing it!”
Myself: “Sorry that you feel that way. Anything else for you?”
Customer: “This is illegal! BREAKING THE LAW!”
(The customer then proceeded through the transaction with a death-stare at me the whole time whilst I smiled back!)
(My partner and I go out for dinner after a 12-hour shift and it’s late at night. All of us, including our waitress, are showing our exhaustion by being a little silly.)
Waitress: “Are you guys ready to order?”
Me: “Yes, I’d like the oreo cheesecake. And the soup.”
Waitress: “I’m sorry, the cheesecake and the what?”
Me: “The soup.”
Waitress: “The… soo? I’m sorry I don’t quite understand you?”
Partner: “The soup. And it’s okay if you’re confused, because it doesn’t make any sense that she ordered just soup and cheesecake.”
Me: “I’m an adult! I want the cheesecake!”
Waitress: “You know what you want, and that’s right, you ARE an adult! A cheesecake and the soup of the day for you.”
Me: “Thanks!” *to partner* “Sorry for being weird.”
Partner: “It’s all right, dear; it’s great you know what you want.”
