Doesn’t Understand The Meat And Potatoes Of Hosting

, , , , | Right | March 11, 2019

(The phone rings.)

Customer: “Hi. I would like to order some potato salad.”

Me: “Okay, how much?”

Customer: “I don’t know. How much do I need?”

Me: “Well, we suggest about a third of a pound per person. How many people are you feeding?”

Customer: “I don’t know.”

Me: “Okay, well, do you have an estimate?”

Customer: “We invited sixty people, but we don’t expect them all to show up.”

Me: “So, for sixty people, you’ll need around twenty pounds.”

Customer: “But we don’t expect to have that many guests.”

Me: “How many do you expect to have?”

Customer: “I don’t know! Just tell me how much potato salad to buy!”

Me: “…”

(The conversation went on in this vein until I eventually just told her to get fifteen pounds. When she balked at the price, I told her to get ten, instead, which appeared to satisfy her.)

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