A Coat Of Awwwwws

I’m working the customer service desk and am dealing with a return from a tall male customer. It’s a safe assumption that my customer is gay, with all the stereotypical mannerisms, etc.

As I am serving my customer, a short old woman starts talking to my coworker to do her own return.

Old Woman: “I need to return this coat. I only wore it the once; I don’t know what I was thinking. It’s a bit too loud for me.”

For some reason, all four of us (two workers, two customers) all realise the same thing at the same time.

The old lady is returning a long winter coat that is EXACTLY the same as the one currently being worn by the young gay man. The man instantly picks up on this.

Young Man: “Oh, no, no, no. Darling, you would slay in that coat! I can just tell! Do not return that!”

Old Woman: “Ha! It’s all right, dear. It looks much better on you than it did on me.”

Young Man: “Well, come on, let me see you wear it.”

Old Woman: “Oh… I don’t know…”

Young Man: “Just let me see. I will give you my honest opinion as a gay man, but I can tell right now that you will be a queen in that thing.”

The old woman, bolstered in confidence by her new cheerleader, tries on the coat.

Young Man: “Yaaaas, queen! You slay, girl! We just need to get you the right accessories, and—”

Old Woman: “You… you really think so?”

Young Man: “What made you get the coat in the first place? Part of you must have liked it.”

Old Woman: “My granddaughters convinced me to try it on. I liked it at first, but I was worried what other people might think… It’s a bit young.”

Young Man: “Your granddaughters think you’re a cool grandma, and so do I. Come here, darling. Let’s go prove them all right.”

And with that, the young man takes the old lady arm-in-arm, and off they go into the shop to do some accessorising. At no point does the old lady look like she was upset or unhappy; in fact, she seems to be happily surprised by the attention.

Within half an hour, they are both leaving the shop, the young man treating this suddenly happy old lady to a scarf, gloves, sunglasses, and some other small odds-and-ends to “complete the look”.

As they’re leaving:

Young Man: “Let’s go get a coffee, darling. We need to do a photo shoot for your Instagram.”

Old Woman: “I don’t have an Instagram.”

Young Man: “Not yet…”

Old Woman: “Oh… how exciting!”

It wasn’t until the next day that the young man came back to do his original return (which he had forgotten about and I had put aside for him). I asked about his adventures with the grandma, and he excitedly showed me her new Instagram account, with pictures from a nearby bougie coffee shop, all dolled up in her coat and accessories.

I followed her, and I love to see them both do their coffees once a week!