Weirdness Is Reaching Boiling Point

Friend: “So [Friend #2] was over earlier and was boiling water on the stove on the highest setting… Who boils water on high?!”

Me: “Uhh… everybody?”

Friend: “What?! No. You’re supposed to boil water on medium to medium-high heat!”

Me: “Why? It’s just going to take longer.”

Friend: “No, seriously. I read the instructions when I bought the pot and it said not to use the highest heat setting.”

Me: *teasing* “Look at you, reading instructions!”

Friend: “Who doesn’t read instructions?! Everybody reads instructions!”

Me: “But on a pot?”

Friend: “I wanted to know how to take care of it so I could get the most use out of it!”

Me: “I hate to break it to you, but you’re the weird one here.”

Friend: “Hey! I’m not the only person who boils water that way!”

Me: “Yeah, but it’s just you and other weirdos. I accept you and your weird ways for what they are, but you’re still weird.”

Friend: “I’m not weird!”

(Yes, she is.)