(It’s the morning shift of a stocking day, so I usually have to put away the contents of a truck while simultaneously attending to any customers my coworkers are too busy to help. My coworkers at this time of day usually include only my manager, maybe one additional crew member, and a cook. As the early morning turns to a few hours until noon, we start getting more and more customers all at once, forcing my manager and additional crew member to call for my help to handle them all. I head to the front of the store to take out a few orders. Before I deliver to this one woman, my manager tells me that she wants to pay with her credit card. I can see more customers coming in and I know my coworkers are going to need my help with them, too, so I don’t really give it much thought. I just take it out.)

Me: *places her order on her table* “Here we are, ma’am. That’ll be $8.78.”

Woman: “I wanted to pay with my card, but it wouldn’t work. Something’s wrong with your machine. I have money on my card.”

(Our booths are installed with a card scanner that allows customers to pay for their orders before they arrive, but because we prioritize speed at our restaurant, we often stop the clock on orders before they’re ready, which causes the machine to think the order is on its way to the customer before it actually is.)

Me: “If I had to guess, the machine probably didn’t have a chance to actually do anything with your card. Let’s try again.”

(I enter in a code that lets me pull up her order and allow it to be paid for — assuming it wasn’t already paid for — and then attempt to run the card.)

Machine: *declines card*

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but your card is being declined.”

Woman: “I know I have money on it; it must be the machine.”

Me: “Well, let’s try another one, then.”

(I take the card to another machine, enter the code, and swipe the card on her order, only to get the same message.)

Me: “I’m… sorry, ma’am. While I won’t claim to know what the problem is, I can say with relative certainty that it’s not an issue with our scanners. These machines have been working on the vast majority of cards perfectly fine since yesterday.”

Woman: *accepts her card back and pulls out her phone* “Fine. I don’t carry cash on me, so I’ll pay with the app.”

Me: “Let me just get the app payment code for your order.”

(I go just behind the see-through employees-only door to pull up the information on a system-tablet. I return and gives her the number.)

Woman: “What do I do with that?”

Me: *comes to the conclusion this is her first time using the app* “You enter it into the app and the order gets paid for.”

(She spends several minutes fiddling with her phone. All the while, I can see customers pouring in. Likewise, I set up the tablet on the other side of the see-through door with the screen showing that the order hasn’t been paid yet.)

Me: “Is there a problem, ma’am?”

Woman: “My phone’s just taking a few minutes to download the app.”

(I was flabbergasted. The app pays by means of prepaid amounts put into a personal account. I was going to have to wait here while she downloaded the app, set up an account, and put $10 on said account before she could pay; all the while, my coworkers were scrambling, trying to juggle the influx of new customers without me. I couldn’t just leave, lest I be held responsible for anything that happened. She took twelve minutes. Anyone who works in the fast food industry knows how long twelve minutes is to coworkers and waiting customers!)

(I’m driving my five-year-old daughter to daycare, and on the way, we’re listening to a very popular rock radio morning show. Today, the hosts are comparing “Bohemian Rhapsody” to “Rocketman.” As I pull up to the daycare and I’m walking her inside, she says:)

Daughter: “Mommy! I didn’t know our Freddie Mercury was famous enough to be talked about on the radio!”

Me: “[Daughter], they weren’t talking about our cat. They were talking about the singer he was named after.”

Daughter: “But I like cats better…”

(Due to it being my time of month with a heavy flow and a very nasty sinus and ear infection, there are a ton of medications in my system but I still get myself to work as I don’t feel that bad. A half hour into my shift I suddenly become very weak and my legs become very shaky. Still I put on a brave face to not worry my coworkers and customers and just lean on the counter and carts for balance. I’m catching my breath when I notice a customer coming up to the counter.)

Me: *assume acting face* Hi, how can I help you.

Customer: *not convinced* Are you alright? You weren’t looking that good and you’re pale.

Me: I’ll be alright it will pass.

Customer: Are you sure? Do you need anything like water or food?

Me: Maybe but I’ll hold off till my break, how much do you need?

Customer: Four yards and I’ll be right back.

(I begin to measure out her material while she runs up to the front. She returns a few minutes later with a chocolate bar in hand.)

Customer: There you go.

Me: *shocked* Oh wow…you didn’t have too.

Customer: Chocolate makes everything better. You’re blood sugar might be low so this should help.

(She was right. After a few nibbles on the chocolate and a quick break, my strength returned and I was able to finish my shift with no problems. I saw the same customer a few days later and she was very happy to see that I was doing better and that the chocolate helped.)

(I’m working on the floor when I spot a couple with their seven year old daughter when I hear this.)

Father: I don’t think this is the right blue.

Mother: And there’s a pattern in this one, we should look for a solid.

Me: *approaches them* We have a lot of solid blues over this away.

(I show them our selection of solid colors and explain the prices.)

Me: So what are you making?

Mother: Our daughter wants to be Katara for Halloween.

Me: From Avatar? Sweet! Can you show me some bending?

*The girl gives me a huge grin and starts doing some bending moves like in the show*

Mother: *laughs* You should see bath time, it gets really interesting.

Father: And she marathons the show almost every day.

(We have a good laugh and I help them pick out what the colors and calculate how much they needed. I saw them again a year later and this time the girl wanted to be Astrid from How to Train Your Dragon. And she still does bending in the bath tub.*

(In between my semesters at college, I work at the local fabric and craft store. During my years working, we come to know this one regular that most of the staff hates seeing. She will be in the store for several hours shopping, and when she finally comes to the cutting counter, she is very particular about who cuts her material and how they cut it — in other words, a huge pain. She is also known for being a pain at the checkout and each visit always involves her calling corporate with a complaint that, when investigated, proves she is making things up. Eventually, corporate starts ignoring her calls. In one of my last encounters with her, she wished that another customer would get into a car accident after she let them cut in line and they didn’t thank her. I’ve returned for a summer and I’m working closing when I realize that I have not seen this regular yet, so I ask my coworker about her.)

Me: “So, [Coworker], I haven’t seen [Regular] in some time. Has she been in here?”

Coworker: “You didn’t know? She got banned.”

Me: “Banned?! But how?”

Coworker: “It started when she tried to use one 40% coupon on every single item she had, claiming that because she was such a valued customer buying so much stuff, we should do that for her. [Manager] explained that our policy was one coupon per item and that we cannot change it. So, [Regular] then started calling [Manager] the N-word.”

(For context, [Manager] is a six-foot-tall black woman.)

Me: “I knew [Regular] was bad, but I didn’t know she was racist!”

Coworker: “It gets better. [Regular] then hung around telling every customer in the store about the terrible N-word woman and how she was going to shoot her in the parking lot later! [Manager] had enough and, once she got word of this, called the police.”

Me: “Did [Regular] get arrested?”

Coworker: “No, she was long gone before they came. But they got her information and recommend that [Manager] never let [Regular] into the store again, and that they were going to her house to let her know that she’s not allowed at the store anymore.”

(Sure enough, it’s been years and that regular has never once returned to store.)