The Ditzy Visit The Dizzy

(I volunteer at the home of 19th-century prime minister Benjamin Disraeli. These are just some of the encounters I’ve had.)

Visitor #1: *VERY loudly in a crowded room, shortly after leaving a talk about him* “So, who’s Benjamin Dizzy?”

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Visitor #2: *enters the room I am alone in* This room has bad energy. Very bad energy. Very bad.”

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Visitor #3: “So, can we touch this?”

Me: *looks at the sign next to it* “No, unfortunately not.”

Visitor #3: “Why not?”

Me: “It’s very old and could be damaged, and an alarm will go off.”

Visitor #3: “Oh… okay.” *touches it anyway, causing an alarm to go off* “Oh, I didn’t know that would happen.”

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Visitor #4: “So… is this place haunted?”

Me: “I’m unsure; it depends on who you believe!”

Visitor #4: “Come on, you can tell me. It’s haunted, isn’t it? Is there a ghost in this room?”

Me: “I hope not. I’m alone in here a lot!”

Visitor #4: “DON’T TOUCH HER! There you go; you’ll be safe.”