Tearing Up The Economy

(I’m a “key carrier” — low-level manager — at a farm store. I’m putting away stock and I receive a page to the registers. Our cashier has a customer who is trying to pay with a five-dollar bill that has been torn in half.)

Cashier: *to me* “Can we take this as payment?”

Me: *to customer* “I’m sorry, sir, but unfortunately, I can’t accept this as payment.”

Customer: “Why not? It’s American currency!”

Me: “Yes, but half of the bill is missing. I wouldn’t be able to use it as change for another customer. If you take this bill to your bank, however, they may be able to swap you for a new five-dollar note.”

Customer: “Well, that sounds like your problem! If it’s so easy, you should go do it yourself! I’m sure you guys make deposits every day; take care of it, then!”

Me: “Sir, I’m not sure what else to tell you, but I can’t accept half of a bill for the full value.”

Customer: “So, you won’t accept American currency! I’d like to speak to your manager!”

Me: “You are, sir. This has zero to do with its country of origin. It’s half of a bill. I’m sorry but there’s nothing else I can do for you.”

Customer: “There’s no reason I should have to take the hit for this. You can override this; I know you can. You just don’t want to. Just give me the number to your corporate office. I’ll explain to them why you just lost a customer over five dollars, and you’ll be out on your a**.”

Me: *irritated beyond the ability to keep my mouth shut* “Okay, tell you what. Give me that bill plus $2.50 and we’ll call it even.”

Customer: “…”