(Due to heavy rainfall we’ve had a few leaks at the back of the shop which has caused the back area’s lighting to short out. Unfortunately, head office won’t allow us to close so we have to make sure all customers are careful. Everyone is warning customers about the back of the shop being dark as they come in. A man walks in and I greet him.)

Me: “Hello there. Just so you know, the back of the shop is a little dark at the moment as our lighting isn’t working. Please be careful.”

Man: *barely acknowledges me*

(A few minutes later the man comes back to the till with a grumpy look on his face.)

Man: “Excuse me; it’s very dark at the back of your shop! Somebody could have an accident. You really should get it sorted!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, our lighting isn’t working at the moment due to some leaks in the heavy rain. We’re hoping to get it fixed as soon as possible.”

Man: “Well, you should at least warn people about it!”

Me: “…”

(I volunteer for a charity second-hand store for a few months. One day a woman who is obviously in a bad mood walks into the store.)

Customer: “Do you sell your clothes racks?”

Me: “Ah, no, ma’am, we need them.”

Customer: “Those racks?” *points to racks where our clothing is hanging*

Me: “Yes, ma’am, we need them to hang our clothes on.”

Customer: “They sell them in Sydney.”

Me: “We aren’t Sydney, ma’am, and we need them to hang our clothing on.”

Customer: “I’m getting your manager!”

(My manager later told me about a crazy lady yelling at her because she wouldn’t sell the clothing racks to her!)

(My husband and I own a thrift shop and consignment store. People bring in items to us either for consignment or to sell us. A lady brings in “an antique lamp.”)

Customer: “I want to sell this lamp, and I expect $300 for it.”

Me: “Hmm, based on our local economy, if genuine, it will only sell for a fraction of that at the most. I can offer $40.”

Customer: *outraged* “It is the same kerosene lamp found in Gone With The Wind and it is worth way more than that!”

Me: “Then it is probably a replica, especially since, despite resembling an antique kerosene lamp, it has an electrical cord coming out of it.”

Customer: “An expert friend of mine appraised it for me and said it is genuine. It is worth a thousand, and I you will be making a huge mistake passing up this deal”

Me: “I am not saying I am an expert, but I doubt I could sell the lamp in my store for much more than I offered, and by all means, I can direct you to other reputable businesses.”

(She left in a huff. A week later, she returned with the lamp, humbly admitting the other businesses only offered her $20.)

(At the store I work at, if something is part of a bundle, the managers will stack things on top of each other, secure them with a rubber band so no one picks up each individual item separately, and then advertise a price for the whole set. One day a customer brings up a printer that has paper and ink rubber-banded to it, and they tell me the price that they saw it for. I scan the barcodes of each individual item, thinking they will bundle out like they always do, but they don’t. I’ve tried voiding and re-ringing the items several times, to no avail. Finally, I call my boss over:)

Me: “Hey [Boss], this isn’t bundling out when I scan in all the items.”

Boss: “That’s because it’s not part of a bundle.”

Me: “Yeah, it is. It’s all rubber-banded together, and it’s listed over on the shelf for [price].”

Boss: “No, it’s not a bundle. Just the printer is that price. We just included the ink and paper because we thought they would need some of that too when they bought their printer.”

Customer: “Oh, well if that’s not a bundle price, then I don’t want it.”

Me: “Okay, sorry about that.” *I void the transaction*

(Some time later, another customer comes up to my register with the same bundle, and I have to explain to them that it’s not a bundle. They ask to speak to my manager, and I call my boss over again.)

Customer: “This isn’t a bundle?”

Boss: “No, you have to buy everything separately.”

Customer: “Then I just want the printer.”

Me: “Okay.” *I ring them up for the printer individually, which comes up at the correct price*

(After getting about four or five customers with this printer bundle issue, I finally turn to my boss, who has come back out of the office after doing some tasks.)

Me: “If it’s not a bundle, can we not rubber-band it all together?”

(He just looked at me and went over to fix the display.)

(I work in an adult novelty store that sells toys. A lady walks in and comes up to the counter and pulls out a very expensive item.)

Customer: “I bought this here and I need to return it and get my money back.”

Me: “All novelty sales are final, due to the intimate nature of the products. That’s the law in this state.”

Customer: “But it’s still in the package!”

Me: “Yeah, but these kinds of products come in easily opened packages, they’re not actually sealed.”

(I take a closer look at the package, and it’s not even an item we carry. I’ve been with the company for almost ten years, and I’m the one that orders all of our stock. The item retails for almost $130, and would never sell in our market.)

Me: “Besides, ma’am, we don’t carry that product. I’m 100% certain of that. So that didn’t come from here.”

Customer: “It was worth trying. So, how much is this worth? I found it outside of someone’s house on the curb. Think I could sell it on eBay?”

Me: *at a complete loss for words as this is beyond disgusting* “I don’t know, but the retail on it is $130.”

Customer: “Thanks for your help!”