If In Doubt, Always Ask: Is There A Teen In The House?

I am taking calls for a cable company way back in the day, back when they are billing for satellite on their bills.

Caller: “This is crazy! Why is there an extra $300 on my bill?!”

I take a quick look and it turns out it’s all for pay-per-view adult entertainment. I gently explain this, and then:

Me: “Sir, those charges are registered from your remote, so they are accurate.”

Caller: “No! I must insist that you take them off the bill!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I’m not authorized to do that. I will need to send a call to our investigations department to test your remote and confirm whether there are any issues. They will make the final determination for credit or not as the charges are all previously generated.”

Caller: “FINE, BUT THEY’D BETTER AGREE TO CREDIT ME, BECAUSE THERE’S NO… one… here… but… my… thirteen-year-old son… Never mind.” *Click*