(My dad, my mom, and I are driving back home from an errand. My dad is at the wheel and we’ve stopped at a red light.)

Car #1: *honk!*

Dad: “Why is he honking? I can’t go nowhere faster.”

Car #1: *honk!*

Mom: “There he goes again! What is he doing?”

Car #1: *honk, honk!*

Dad: “I’m gonna honk back…” *honk!*

Car #1: *honk!*

Dad: *honk!*

Car #1: *honk!*

(By now I’m giggling a little bit when suddenly…)

Car #2: *honk!*

Dad: *honk!*

Car #3: *honk!*

Car #1: *honk!*

Dad: *honk!*

Car #4: *honk!*

(Pretty soon all three lanes were honking their horns until the light turned green and we were laughing our butts off. I looked over to a car on my left and saw other people laughing as much as we were. This little moment made my day.)

(I’m French and I’m on vacation with friends in Germany. I’m the only person in my group who’s not a native German speaker and even though I understand everything they tell me, I’m definitely not bilingual. Among my group, there are two ten-year-old girls who think my way of speaking is quite funny. Now, we are outside and there are many wasps around. I’m VERY afraid of wasps, bees, and other stinging insects. Suddenly, I feel something on my head. I try to keep calm and to remember the German word for wasps.)

Me: *in German* “Is there a bzz-bzz on my head?”

(The little girls burst into mad laughter. I try hard to keep calm as I’m still wondering if there’s something on my head.)

Grown-Up Friend: “No, there’s nothing on your head.”

Girl #1: “There’s no bzz-bzz on your head!”

Grown-Up Friend: “You see, [Girl #1], this is universal language!”

Girl #1: “I speak universal language! I like miaow-miaows!”

Girl #2: “I prefer woof-woofs!”

Me: “I don’t like bzz-bzzs. What’s the German word for bzz-bzz?”

Grown-Up Friend: “It’s waspe.”

Me: “Thank you very much.”

(The little girls kept using ‘universal language’ for some time. At least I made them laugh!)

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(I have an online friend who is really into hairstyles and the like. He also likes period movies. He is watching a movie while we’re chatting on Skype.)

Friend: “Okay. I am already pissed at the movie.”

Me: “Why?”

Friend: “It is a period piece and the main guy character has hair gel in his hair.”

(One day I go over to my mate’s house for a jamming session. This is the first time I have been in his room and I notice how on one side of his wall closest to his bed he has several posters of heavy metal bands, and some Satanic bands as well. Then on the right he has a poster of the 12 Apostles at the Last Supper. I point this out as I think it is pretty funny.)

Friend: “Well, it’s simple. When I’m in a happy mood I chill with God; when I’m in a pissed off mood I chill with Satan.”

(My friend and I are watching the first part of The Hobbit. She’s never seen it before. We come to the scene where our heroes escape from the goblins in the mountain.)

Friend: “Wow, this is scary. It’s so dangerous!”

Me: “What is?”

Friend: “They’re running so fast on those flimsy little wooden bridges! They don’t even have anything to hold on to! That’s scary, you know!”

Me: “So… being attacked on the way by hundreds of angry goblins isn’t?”

Friend: “Not half as scary as those bridges! Look, planks are missing and everything! I can’t believe they run so fast without fear of falling down…”

Me: “You never cease to amaze me, you know?”