Always Let Your Kaiju Be Your Guide

(I am nine years old. My brother is 18 months old, and has started talking. I’m usually the only one who understands him. He is pointing at the TV.)

Brother: “Tokyo, Tokyo!”

Mom: “Did he just say Tokyo? Does he want to watch Godzilla? How did he even see that stuff? You know I don’t want him watching violent movies; he’s too young!”

Me: “Hold on, mom.”

(I go to my brother.)

Me: “Hey, buddy. Does Tokyo go like this?”

(I place my finger on my nose, and zoom it out, making a ‘whoop’ noise like it’s growing.)

Brother: “YEAH! TOKYO!”

Me: “He says he wants to watch Pinocchio.”

Mom: “Oh.”

(Ironically, my brother is now 21, and a massive ‘Godzilla’ fan!)