23 Hilarious Stories That Boldly Go Where No One Has Been Before – Happy Star Trek Day!

Dear readers,

On September 8th, 1966, NBC debuted a risky new show billed as a “wagon train to the stars” in an age where westerns and police procedurals were all the rage on network television. You don’t need to do a Vulcan mind-meld to know that the show in question, was Star Trek, and many decades later it still holds such a sway on western pop culture that it’s responsible for common phrases (set phasers to stun!), invented letter-writing campaigns to save canceled shows, and even an emoji 🖖 !

In celebration of the anniversary of such an iconic franchise, we’ve retrieved 23 classic stories from Memory Alpha about the trekkiest of Trekkies. We hope you live long and prosper, after enjoying this collection!

But It Does Have A Heisenberg Compensator – Make sure your PC wasn’t made on Romulus before you buy it.

Hailing Frequencies Open But Nobody’s Home – Be scared if this guy wants to buy a phaser.

Star Trek Names: The Next Generation – Our money is on K’Ehleyr.

Starfleet Demands Perfection – Don’t EVER let them put you in a red shirt!

Pointy Well Taken – It would be illogical to let a disruptive customer stay.

About To Start A Star Trek War – If you’re going to insult the franchise at least pick the right one!

You Will Be Medicated – Let’s hope they didn’t wake up with Borg implants.

A Mother’s Realm Of Fear – When your daughter is the real McCoy.

Trekkies: The Next Generation – If you don’t pass on this knowledge to the next generation they will only go and redshirt themselves.

Working Your Way Up To The Bridge – They won’t be in the lower decks for long.

That Is Not The Droid You Are Looking For – The adventures of Spork Skywalker!

Maximum Warp To Krypton – A Super-Kirk would keep getting his ‘S’ ripped.

Paying By Cash Or Picard – Paying by this method breaks the blockchain of command.

Driving Into Darkness – These quotes are pure movie-trailer-trash.

Aimless Assimilating – They’re not walking aimlessly; you just don’t understand their unimatrix.

Boldly Going Into Employment – When you’ve been accepted into the academy!

The Tribble-ations Of Pet Ownership – Just make sure they’ve been fixed or else!

A Long But Prosperous Day – It’s only dangerous if you have a type-L phase discriminating amplifier, not a type-R.

Hopefully The Next Supply Will Live Long And Prosper – Vulcan has the best delis!

Universal Translator Not Required – Father and I… at Tanagra.

And The Children Shall Lead, Part 2 – There truly is hope for The Next Generation.

All Bad Things – Learn from Q; bullies never win.

Passing The Exam Requires Omnipotence – Well, first you have to put all of humanity on trial…

We hope you enjoyed this Star Trek-themed roundup! Let us know in the comments if there were any stories we forgot to include! Want to send in your own story? Pull out some crayons and submit your story here!

Check out more roundups here to see if you’ve missed any!