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But It Does Have A Heisenberg Compensator

| Learning | February 18, 2014

(I am in college, studying computing. A friend one year below me is trying to cheat on his computer hardware assignment.)

Friend: “You did this assignment last year, right? Can you send me what you wrote for your description of a CPU?”

Me: “Uh… Sure.”

Friend: “Great! That would be really helpful.”

(I check my computer to find a file I’d written months ago just to entertain myself in a moment of boredom. The file was half a page of Star Trek techno-babble nonsense. I prefix the nonsense text with ‘A CPU can be described as…’ and send him the ‘CPU description.’)

Friend: *glances at text* “Thanks! That’s an awesome description!”

Me: “No problem.”

Friend: *looking proud* “Hey, [Teacher], can you check out my CPU description to see if it’s okay for the assignment?”

Teacher: “Okay.”

(About thirty seconds of silence pass as the teacher reads the ‘CPU description.’)

Teacher: *slowly mumbling* “I don’t think the CPU has a quantum singularity warp core.”

(The friend didn’t try cheating from me again!)

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