Unfiltered Story #183970

(I work at a midrange, limited service chain hotel as the main night auditor. For some reason I’ve yet to fathom, people think I’m the source of all or just a good source of info period, for I get the oddest requests/questions at the oddest times, including:)

1. Do you know where/how I can get (name of illegal drug)?
2. Do you know where/how I can get a prostitute (or variation of that word)?, or You’re available for sex, right (or variation of this)?
4. Can’t you just sell me that beer/wine? No one will know! (It’s during the time I can’t legally sell any alcohol out of our hotel’s pantry, plus I’m on CCTV!)
5. Can’t you just give me the room for free/less money/the one you held back for emergencies?
6. Why don’t you sell condoms/cigarettes/other item I don’t obviously have?
7. What you do mean, I have to be quiet/polite/pay?

(The last is usually after asking someone to quiet down, or not cuss, or pay up for services rendered (the room etc), and them not wanting to, even if they think ’cause it’s 3am makes it OK to act like an idiot….)