You Say Tomato, I Say Food Poisoning

I work in a call center for a food manufacturer.

Caller: “I have one of your cans of tomatoes, and I was wondering if it was still good to eat.”

Me: “What’s the expiry date?”

Caller: “August 3rd.”

Me: “Well, today is August 2nd, so you—”

Caller: “—2006.”

Me: “…I wouldn’t advise eating it, ma’am.”

Caller: “Are you sure? It’s still in its packaging.”

Me: “I would strongly advise against eating it, ma’am.”

Caller: “Seems a shame for it to go to waste.”

Me: “I would seriously strongly advise against eating it, ma’am.”

Caller: “I also have this other one from 2013. Do you think—”

Me: “Ma’am, where are you getting these from?!”

Caller: “Oh, I’m cleaning out my cupboards.”

Me: “I would advise throwing away every product that’s past its expiry date, ma’am.”

Caller: “Oh, I’m not doing that; it would be a waste! I’ll just throw it in some pasta and feed it to my husband. He’ll eat anything.”

Me: “Ma’am, I—”

Caller: “Thanks for your help!” *Click*

I hope the husband was okay!