Woke Up On The Wrong Side Of The Bed Tomorrow

(The Saturday issue of the local paper we sell is called the “Sunday Early Edition” since it contains a section of coupons, classified ads, etc. A customer brings one such paper to the counter.)

Customer: “Just a tall coffee and the paper today.”

Me: “Sure, that’ll be $*.**!”

Customer: *looks down at paper* “Oh, I grabbed the wrong paper. Let me put this back.”

(He takes the paper back to the newspaper rack, and I assumed he wanted one of the national papers, but he comes back and slaps the local paper on the counter.)

Customer: “Don’t you have any of TODAY’S papers?”

Me: “Ah… sorry, what?”

Customer: “It’s only nine in the morning; you shouldn’t have tomorrow’s paper yet!”

Me:“Tomorrow’s paper? Sir, this is definitely today’s paper!”

Customer: “NO! It says SUNDAY on it, right there! It’s only Saturday!”

Me: “Yes, however the [Paper] calls its Saturday paper the “Sunday Early Edition” since it has coupons and such in it.”

Customer: “But it says SUNDAY! See? Every page says Sunday!”

Me: “I see it, sir, but that’s just what they call the Saturday paper. I assure you, it’s today’s paper. Tomorrow’s paper hasn’t been printed yet.”

Customer: “I’m putting this back. I don’t want tomorrow’s newspaper!” *walks off in a huff*