Who’s The Doofus?

When I am young and naive and don’t know about magazine subscriptions, I stop by my favorite bookstore to pick up a fantasy magazine that is issued six times a year.  

On one particular day, I stop in and search for the magazine. No dice. I check to make sure that copies haven’t moved themselves to another part of the shelving unit — which is how I found it last time, stuck in the Women’s Magazine section.

There are no copies left and I check with a salesperson to see if there are any on order or if they have sold out.

Salesperson:
“Oh, that magazine. Yeah. Everyone is always asking for it. We get a dozen copies in and only a dozen because no one ever buys it.”

Me:
“I buy it. And whenever I come in to purchase it, there’s usually only two or three copies left.”

Salesperson:
“Yeah. We only get a few copies in because no one buys it.”

Me:
“But if you buy twelve copies and they sell out, and more people come in asking for it, then someone must be buying it.”

Salesperson:
“No. No one buys it so we only get in a few copies.”  

We went around on this two or three times. She simply could not see that if the magazine was selling out and people were requesting it after it sold out, people clearly wanted to buy it.

After this, a friend told me, “Doofus, just get a subscription.”

So I did.