Warped Language

We are hosting a midnight screening of “The Rocky Horror Picture Show,” and as such, most of us are in costume. I am dressed as Columbia during the Time Warp. I couldn’t find a jacket for my bust size that I liked, so I ended up making one myself.

Customer: “Oh, I do love your nipples!”

My eyes widen and I stare at him in shock. No part of my chest is exposed. It takes him a few seconds to realise. 

Customer: “No, no! I meant lapels. I’m not a pervert, I swear! Just, the lapels are huge, and the rhinestones are incredible. You can’t even see your nipples… I’m going to stop talking.”

I burst out laughing and thanked him for the compliment before I tore his ticket and let him into the theatre.