(We close early at 5 on Sundays, which usually throws some customers who assume we are open until our regular time. Most customers get the hint when the lights automatically dim at closing and the music is turned off. Sometimes, however, customers still don’t get the hint. A couple and their young daughter walk in at 4:55 and begin shopping around. By 5:20, they are the only ones left in the store and seem to have no idea that we’re closed. I decide to go up to them to see if they need any help.)

Me: “Hi, can I help you guys find anything today?”

Customer: “Nope, we’re finding everything all right, thanks.”

Me: “Okay, great! Just so you know, we are closing soon, so just let me know if I can help you find anything.”

Customer: *brushing me away* “Uh-huh, thanks.”

(About 15 more minutes pass. The store is recovered immaculately and the closing team is literally just waiting for these customers to check out so we can close the last register and go home. I decide to try one more time.)

Me: “Are you three still doing all right?”

Customer: “Yeah, we’re doing fine. Just looking around still!”

Me: “Okay…”

(At this point, the family begins to head to the dressing room to try clothes on. I’m beginning to get pretty annoyed and impatient, so I turn to my coworker.)

Me: “[Coworker], what time is it?”

Coworker: “It’s 5:40.”

Me: *sighing* “Guess we’re not going home any time soon.”

Customer: *turns around cheerfully surprised* “Oh! By the way, what time do you guys close?”

Coworker: “We actually closed at five.”

Customer: “Oh, silly me! We’ll get going now.”

(The family ended up using a rewards points coupon which covered pretty much their whole purchase, meaning the store made no money off of them and there was no benefit to having them in the store so late.)

(My sister and I are tourists, and we are enjoying walking down a street and looking at all the high-end clothing stores, as we don’t have very much of that sort of thing in our town. Most of the store clerks are very polite, as we are clean-cut and relatively well dressed, until we walk into one particular store, and begin to look around.)

Clerk: *approaching us* “Can I help you with anything?”

Sister: “Oh, I was just looking at this belt here. The one with the snails on it?”

Clerk: “Do you mean the belt with the escargot design?”

Sister: “Yes?”

Clerk: “Can I help you with anything ELSE?”

Sister: “No, thank you. We’re just browsing.”

Clerk: *huffs, and turns away, abruptly* “Well! I suppose that’s LEGAL.”

(I help a mother find a dress for her daughter for a special occasion. It is really busy since it is prom season but we are able to find a dress. She is a bit demanding, but we try to accommodate as much as we can. Before deciding, we are talking about possibilities for alterations.)

Customer: “So the dress will be finished by then, RIGHT?”

Me: “Yes, I assure that it will all be fixed by then.”

Customer: “It better be since I’m paying all of this money for one dress.”

Me: “Well, if you prefer, there is another place that does alterations right around the corner. If you want, we can leave the dress on hold so you can check to see if their prices are within your price range.”

Customer: “No, I don’t want to. It’s such a hassle.”

Me: “All right, then.”

(My coworker turns to me for help.)

Coworker: “How do you spell ‘corset?'”

Me: “C-O-R-S-E-T.”

Customer: “…T-E! It is spelled; C-O-R-S-E-T-T-E.”

Me: *sighs with an awkward smile*

(I work in a bridal shop where in order to do pretty much anything we need the brides information, and the wedding date. A girl comes in with her dad to be measured for a dress and tells me the bride called our store.)

Me: “Do you happen to know if anyone else ordered the dress yet?”

Dad: “I’m not sure.”

Me: “Okay, when is the wedding? I can look up the paperwork and find out.”

Dad: “…” *blank stare*

Me: “Okay… What’s the bride’s name, then?”

Dad: “I don’t know…”

(I understand the dad not knowing, but the daughter was at least 14. How do you be in a wedding and not know anything about it?)

(My mother goes into a store and buys a pair of leggings. In addition to being on sale, there is a further 10% off.)

Employee: “The sale prices are not in the tills, so we have to work out the prices manually.”

(She started typing into a calculator. My mother thought she was doing something else, but then she realised that this girl actually needed a calculator to figure out 10% of £3.00.)