(I overhear a boy about the age of 8, wandering through the pet store and looking at the fish tanks.)
Boy: “27 cents for a goldfish? What a rip-off!”
(He wanders down to the tanks containing very large fancy goldfish.)
Boy: “$50 for a goldfish? What a rip-off!”
(He continues in this fashion, reading the prices out aloud and exclaiming ‘what a rip-off!’ after each one. His father tracks him down.)
Father: “Hey buddy, ready to go?”
Boy: “Look at this pretty fish, dad!”
Father: “$15? What a rip-off!”
(I always forget to put the butter away after making my toast, and my parents (usually my dad) always remind me to. They stress how when I’m out on my own, I won’t have anyone to remind me. Furthermore, they always tell me not to leave any food under the stove lights. On this particular morning, I remembered and am just putting the lid back on the butter when my dad walks in.)
Dad: “Hey, don’t put it away! I need to use it.”
Me: “Okay…I was just putting the lid on it, since you guys are always reminding me.”
(I leave the kitchen as Dad starts to use the butter on his toast. I come back to the kitchen a couple hours later. The butter has been left on the counter, under the stove lights, almost completely melted.)
Me: *facepalm*
(I’m working in an electronics retail store, and see a man in his late 40s with a kid no older then 10.)
Me: “Welcome sir, did you get…”
(I look in his cart and see that it’s mostly filled with identical Spongebob DVDs.)
Me: “…everything?”
Man: “I guess so.”
Boy: “MORE SPONGEBOB! SPONGEBOB! SPONGEBOB!”
Man: “All right, let’s go get some more.”
(About 5 minutes later he comes back, with more Spongebob DVDs… the same ones, to be exact.)
Man: “All right, I think this is enough.”
(I ring him up, and the total comes to about $550.00 USD.)
Me: *whispering* “Uhh, sir… these are mostly the same thing.”
Man: “Oh, don’t worry about it. I hate my life anyway.”
(A man and his two sons are checking out through my register. The younger of the two sons grabs a bag of Skittles from the candy selection.)
Son: “Dad, can I have some Skittles?”
Dad: “No. Teenage girls eat Skittles. And what are teenage girls?”
Both sons: *raising their little fists in the air* “EVIL!”
Also seen on Not Always Right
Child: “Daddy! Look at this!”
(The father comes over to find his child looking at an adult magazine.)
Father: *to me* “What the h*** is wrong with you? How can you let a 6-year-old boy look at this smut?!”
Me: *ringing up another customer* “Sir, I’m with another customer right now.”
Father: *waving the magazine in my face* “He is way too young for this! Why didn’t you stop him from looking at this?” *he starts screaming obscenities*
(My manager walks by as this is happening.)
Manager: “Sir, she is a cashier, not a babysitter. It is not her job to watch your child, it is yours. She was doing her job when you came up to scream at her. Now get out before I call the police.”
(The man looks embarrassed as he leads his son out. A minute later, he walks back in.)
Father: *mumbles* “I forgot my other son.”
Also seen on Not Always Right
