Really Gets The Blood Pumping

| Working | January 7, 2014

(I’m at a clinic to give a blood donation. Everything is going smoothly, and I’m making small talk with the nurses, until I lay down to actually make the donation.)

Nurse #1: “I’m sorry. I can’t take your blood today.”

Me: “What? I thought everything was in order. All my tests came back within normal range.”

Nurse #1: “I know, but I can’t take your blood. You’re too calm.”

Me: “What?”

Nurse #1: “You obviously get some kind of sexual satisfaction from donating, so I can’t take your blood.”

Me: “WHAT? That’s ridiculous. Just because I don’t freak out at needles doesn’t mean I have a fetish for it!”

Nurse #1: “I’m sorry. I just can’t—”

Nurse #2: “Shut the f*** up and stick the f****** kid!”

Nurse #1: “But he’s going to—”

Nurse #2: “Stick. The. Kid.”

(Nurse #1 took my blood and didn’t say another word the rest of the time I was there.)

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