Military Intelligence That Skips A Generation

I am working in the box office on a slow Sunday. Our theater chain offers online showtimes, ticket purchases, and information about each theater, when the location is chosen. A family of four approaches the box office and my coworker greets them.

Coworker: “Hi, how are you today?”

Customer: “I’d like four for [Movie], military discount.”

Coworker: “I’m sorry, sir, we don’t have a military discount.”

Customer: “Your site says you do.”

Coworker: “Some of our theaters do have the military discount, mostly ones near bases—”

Customer: *Interrupting* “Your site says you have it.” *Turning toward his son* “Show it to me.”

Coworker: “If you call our corporate office and complain, that is the only way we might get the military discount.”

The customer is not paying attention, forcefully telling his son to show him the site on his phone. By now, my coworker is getting understandably upset; she has tried explaining to the customer that the military discount is unavailable at our particular theater. I am trying not to laugh, because I understand that the father is calling his son out about being wrong.

Son: “See, it says right here!” 

The son holds his phone up and the customer looks at it.

Customer: “WISCONSIN?!”

Son: “What?”

Customer: “We’re not in Wisconsin!”

He turns back to my coworker.

Customer: “What time does the movie start?”

Coworker: “It starts at 7:25, sir.”

Customer: *Checks his watch* “All right, four for the movie.”

My coworker tells him the price and completes the transaction. As they pass through the doors, we hear the customer scolding his son sarcastically about “taking a road trip.” We’re silent until the doors shut behind them, and then I burst out laughing.

Me: “How did they get a Wisconsin zip code out of Virginia?”