Best To File This One Away

Caller: “I am a year behind on the current week. How do I close the week?”

Me: “I can help you with that. You go to ‘File’, then ‘Close current week’.”

Caller: “I don’t have ‘File’.”

Me: “Hmm…then you must not have access to this function. Can you log in as the supervisor?”

Caller: “I am logged in as the supervisor.”

Me: “You’re sure you don’t have ‘File’? It should be listed at the top right.”

Caller: “Let me tell you what have. I have ‘File’, ‘View’, ‘Employee’, ‘Period’-”

Me: “That’s it there. Please choose ‘File’.”

Caller: “I don’t have ‘File’.”

Me: “But, you just said you had ‘File’.”

Caller: “No, it’s not there.”

Me: “Please call out what you have again at the top.”

Caller: “I have ‘File’, ‘View’, ‘Emplo’-”

Me: “That’s it. You have ‘File’. Please choose ‘File’ from the top left.”

Caller: *frustrated* “But, I don’t have ‘File’! I already told you!”

Me: *clears throat* “Please read out what you have again. Very…slowly.”

Caller: “Okay. I have ‘File’, Vi-”

Me: “Stop there, please. What was that?”

Caller: “I have Fi-”

Me: “You have ‘File’?”

Caller: “I have ‘File’.”

(I pause, hoping this allows the caller to get it.)

Caller: “Oh, you mean THIS ‘File’!”

Me: *cheerily* “Yes!”

Caller: “I click on this one?”

Me: “Yes, please.”

Caller: “Oh, that’s the one! Thank you so much!”