App-lying It Literally

(I work for a chain that allows guests to check in online. Though it says that they can “grab their keys and go,” most guests don’t take that literally and understand that they still need to let us know. Except for this one regular that’s very brusque:)

Me: *checking in someone else*

Regular: *reaches across my desk and GRABS his keys and prepares to run off with it*

Me: “Excuse me, sir! What are you doing?”

Regular: “Grabbing my keys! You were busy!”

Me: “I know what the app says, but you still need to let us check you into the computer! Otherwise, how can we charge you?”

Regular: “I was just doing what the app said to!” *stomps off*

Other Customer: *speaking with jaw drop* “What a grouch. I have used the app and still know not to reach and grab my keys like that! It’s so rude!”

Me: “Welcome to my world.”

(The keys were moved further away from the guests’ reach just in case they take what the app said too literally again.)

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