Adult Stores Gets The Least Adult Calls

(I work in an adult store, but I answer the phone both for us and for the topless club next door. Most people call with questions about the topless club.)

Caller: “What are the qualifications to work there?”

Me: “You have to be 18.”

Caller: “Oh, okay. That’s it?”

Me: “Yep. You’d have to fill out an application and talk to a manager.”

Caller: “Oh, okay. Well, I’m real pretty.”

Me: “Okay.”

Caller: “I mean, I’m a little thick, but some guys like that.”

Me: “Uh-huh.”

Caller: “And I have a few burn scars. See, I grew up in the ghetto. Let me just start from when I was born—”

Me: *click*