A Self-Serving Situation

(I’m at the store with my aunt, who is stubborn about using newer technology. I only have a few items, so I’m using self checkout.)

Aunt: “What are you doing over here? I’ve already put my stuff on the belt at the next register!”

(This register has three other people in line, all with many items.)

Me: “It’s okay; I’ll probably be done before you are anyway.”

(I resume scanning my items, while my aunt watches. When I’m done, I give the machine a $20 bill. It instructs me to take my change. My aunt’s eyebrows shoot up to the top of her forehead as she gasps.)

Aunt: “It gives you your change?! So… it’s like a vending machine… for GROCERIES?!”

Me: “Uh… yeah. I suppose.”

(My aunt rushes back to her old register, which has barely moved. All the people are staring at her. She brings her items over to me.)

Aunt: “DO MINE NEXT! I WANT TO USE THE GROCERY VENDING MACHINE!”

Me: “…I can’t take you anywhere…”