Unfiltered Story #326598

My friend and I were joking about a mutual acquaintance who seemed to believe every women out there was in on a conspiracy to take advantage of him in some way.

Friend: “In [acquaintance]’s defense it is true that every women that ever slept with me was just using me for my fabulous riches.”

We were both putting ourselves through college, leaving very little in way of ‘fabulous riches’ left over for anyone.

Me: “Yeah I’m not sure that is a representative sampling though.”
Friend: “Whatever do you mean? I’m perfectly representative!”
Me: “Well every women you ever slept with was also doing it to steal your DNA so they could clone a mini you that they could dress up in a tiny clown outfit and make do tricks for their amusement.”
Friend: “True, but in their defense I clearly have the sort of genes that just scream I should be turned into a clown.”

At this point I should probably point out my friend is gay, and as far as I’m aware has never slept with any women.