Unfiltered Story #223049

(I work at a large chain garage, with our own battery brand and warranty, as a service writer.)
Customer: My battery is bad and it’s only a year old. I bought it from you guys. It won’t even start my car or charge! I had to take it out myself to bring it in here! (She is visibly irritated.)

Me: I’m sorry to hear that ma’am. Well, if you’ll just let me take your battery, I’ll have to test it. If it tests bad I will certainly get you a new one free of charge. However, if it’s completely dead, which it sounds like it is, I’ll have to charge it for an hour first. If you leave me your number, I’ll call you in an hour with the results. (She leaves me her number and storms out.)

An hour passed and the customer calls back and speaks to my master tech while I’m busy with a customer. The conversation went something like this:

Tech: Yes ma’am, your battery is done charging and it tested good. There is most likely an underlying cause that had drained the battery completely.

Customer: That’s impossible! You’re a bunch of lying $#@holes! I had this battery tested at 3 different places and they told me it had a bad cell.
*Tech chuckles a bit under his breath*
Tech: Ma’am, our batteries are maintenance free, meaning the cells are sealed. The only way to test for a bad cell is to remove some electrolyte with a hydrometer and test that. This is of course impossible with a sealed battery, as there is no access to the cells.

Customer: You people just don’t want to warranty your own battery! I want to speak to a manager!
*Tech puts me back on since I’m the ASM*

Me: Hello again ma’am, what seems to be the problem?

Customer: Explain to me, how three different places told me the battery is bad, but you, the place I bought it from, suddenly tell me it’s good?!

Me: That would be because the battery took a full charge and tested good ma’am. Did these three other places charge the battery first?

Customer: Of course not! I told them it wouldn’t take a charge since it wouldn’t charge for me at home!

Me: I see. What type of charger did you use on the battery at home ma’am? Because it was completely dead when you brought it to me.

Cusomter: I used my truck.

Me: What?

Customer: I hooked my jumper cables up to my truck while it was running and attached the other end to this battery. I did it for 20 minutes and it didn’t take the charge!

*Customer comes back into store in person and makes me test the battery on a different machine that shows voltage when putting a load on, all while on the phone with her brother. The battery put out 12.4v without load and 11.4 with load.*

Customers brother: Wow, 11.4, that’s really low. Must be a bad battery.
*My veins were exploding at this point so I ran up front, grabbed a brand new battery, and tested it right in front of the customer. The new battery read 12.4v and 11.4v with load.*

Customer: *blushes with embarrassment* well, I’ll be contacting your store manager! This battery better work now!

It’s been two weeks. Haven’t heard anything.