Unfiltered Story #215165

(Whenever I’m even slightly tired I start to do some really weird things as if my brain thinks I’m living in a weird alternate universe where it’s normal. Here are some of those stories.)
Me: *picks up lunchbox*
Friend: *can’t see his own lunchbox, even though it’s right in front of him*
Me: *thinks* Is he momentarily blind?
Me: *to [Friend]* Are you invisible?
(A different time:)
Me: *walks across room*
Me: *stands on round corner of a box*
Me: *instinctively jumps through the air* CACTUSES ARE COMING FOR OUR SOULS!
Me:*lands face – first on bed*
Friend: What’s wrong with you?!