Wedding-Crash My Dreams

(My husband and I have gone on what has become an annual camping trip with a cycling group. We mainly stick to ourselves but have struck up a friendship with a woman on our second trip whom I notice is very smiley and pays extra attention to my husband. On our third trip she hangs around us, pretty much like a bad smell. We have all walked together to the centre where the showers are. Husband goes to the male showers while she and I head to the female ones.)

Friend: *a bit snottily* “You know, [Husband] is quite good looking. You really should marry him before someone else takes him from you.”

Me: “We are married.”

Friend: “What?! How long?” *looking crestfallen*

Me: “Over a year now, about 18 months.”

Friend: “But you aren’t wearing a ring.”

Me: “Not wearing a ring doesn’t mean I’m any less married. I can’t wear it with my cycling gloves anyway, and it’s safer at home.”

Friend: “But, but how is anyone to know you are married?”

(Funnily she stopped hanging around so much and didn’t turn up the next year.)