Those Pecs Defy Gravity

(I am in physics class, doing a worksheet about g, the rate at which all things fall to Earth. My teacher comes up behind me and picks up the book I’ve been reading: a romance novel whose cover is just a well-muscled chest. No head, no legs. Just the chest.)

Teacher: “[My Name], I have to ask: is this book G-rated?”

(I wordlessly take it, flip it over, and drop it onto my desk so it lands with the back cover facing up.)

Me: “Yes. ‘g’ rates this book a success.”

Teacher: *sighs* “Just cover up the naked guy, okay?”