Classmate: “So, how old are you, [Maths Teacher]?”

Maths Teacher: “I’m 36.”

Me: “Oh! That’s a square number!”

(Groups in my personal health education lesson are given scenarios and have to explain to the class what they would do. One group of girls stands up.)

Girl #1: “So, our scenario is that our friend is desperate to lose weight, even though she is actually fine, and is planning to resort to using drugs to lose that weight.”

Girl #2: “So we decided that…”

(Girl #2 launches into a long, detailed talk about several reactions to the problem, including setting the friend up with a boyfriend and ambushing her and singing ‘You’re Beautiful’ to cheer her up. Most of the class is impressed, until…)

Girl #2: “So, that was most of our ideas, and—”

Girl #3: *matter of factly* “and we thought that if everything else fails, we just unfriend her on Facebook and pretend we don’t know her anymore.”

(The marching band is preparing to take a trip to Orlando, Florida, in a couple of weeks. We will be taking charter buses that have built-in TV screens for watching movies. The band director informs us that the movies we bring must be rated G or PG. After class, one student tries to argue this point with an assistant director.)

Student: “It’s not fair! Good movies are at least PG-13! Name one good movie that’s G or PG?”

Assistant Director: “Toy Story.”

Student: “…okay. That’s ONE.”

(It is in high school debate club. One idiotic and ditzy girl has shown up, to the surprise of all of us.)

Teacher: “So, [Girl] why did you show up today?”

Girl: “Well, I had detention, and I told the teacher I had to meet with you so I could get out of it.”

Teacher: “Really? You shouldn’t do that.”

(A little while later, our meeting wraps up.)

Teacher: “So our topic next week will be euthanasia.”

Girl: “Wait? So we’re debating whether they should let kids into Asia?”

(I am in a choir for girls from grade 6 to 12, so there is quite an age range. I am a senior in high school and am talking to one of my friends who is also in high school about the newest Disney movie.)

Middle Schooler: “Wait, you are going to see Frozen?”

Me: “I’ve already seen it, but I am going a second time.”

Middle Schooler: “High schoolers like Disney movies?! I thought you would be too old for that!”