(I’ve ordered a chocolate shake, but when I receive it, it’s clearly vanilla. I don’t much like vanilla, so I take it back to the counter.)
Me: “Hi, I wanted chocolate? I think this is vanilla.”
Cashier: “Oh, it actually is chocolate; it just looks and tastes like vanilla.”
(I didn’t really know what to say to that!)
(I’m just finishing the cleaning from the Saturday evening shift. It’s around 1:30 am Sunday morning. Note: sometimes our lazy boss doesn’t bother to make up next week’s rotation until late on Saturday evening.)
Me: “Hey [Boss], there’s a problem with the rota you’ve just put up. I’m scheduled to open up on Sunday morning.”
Boss: “So?”
Me: “That’s only four and half hours from now!”
Boss: “So?”
Me: “I can’t get home, showered and changed in that time. Besides, you know I don’t work on Sundays.”
Boss: “So? Find someone to cover your shift.”
Me: “It’s the middle of the night. How can I find someone to cover me in four hours time?”
Boss: “Well if you don’t, you’re opening up at 6:00.”
Me: “Right, you know it’s illegal to schedule two shifts without a decent break in between, and you know I don’t work Sundays for religious reasons. YOU find someone to cover, because I’m NOT coming in!”
(I found out later he went to the all-night drinking place round the corner, drank for four hours, and then did the opening shift himself.)
(Everyone in the kitchen wears headsets to hear the drive-thru. This is so we can make the order while the customer is ordering.)
Me: “Hey, how are you today?”
Customer: “Just a sec… s***!”
Me: *deadpan* “I’m sorry, sir; we don’t serve that here.”
(The entire kitchen erupts in laughter.)
Customer: *also laughing* “If I wanted that, I’d go to [competitor]!”
(My boyfriend and I are regulars at this restaurant, and as such, our orders are fairly well known.)
Me: “I want a Number 1, with cheese, only ketchup and mayo, medium, with a pineapple smoothie.”
Cashier: “Okay, that’s a Number 1, with cheese, only ketchup and mayo, medium, with a pineapple smoothie. I should have this memorized by now!”
Me: “If we keep coming in here every weekend, you will!”
(While my boyfriend places his order, I go sit down and wait for our food.)
Cashier: *to the grillworker* “This sandwich is supposed to be only ketchup and mayo.”
Grillworker: “Okay, gotcha.”
(A few minutes later, I hear the cashier talking to the grillworker again.)
Cashier: “This isn’t what I asked for. Only ketchup, only mayo, cheese. This is that sandwich, without lettuce.”
Grillworker: “Right, that sandwich, without lettuce.”
Cashier: “No. Only ketchup, only mayo, with cheese.”
Grillworker: “Okay, I’ll fix it.”
(This goes on for awhile. Eventually, our order comes up, and my sandwich is correctly labeled. What did I find when I opened it? No lettuce, no mayo, ketchup, mustard, and pickles. I show it to the cashier.)
Cashier: “Why is it that they stick me with the idiots on Sundays?”
Me: “Your employer does that to you, too?”
(I work at a fast food chain. I have just finished dealing with an absolutely horrendous customer, but I cannot take a break yet. My boss is sympathetic, but a little strict about breaks. I steel myself for the next customer.)
Me: “Hi, how can I help you?”
Customer: “One second, sorry.”
(She is writing something on a slip of paper.)
Customer: “Okay, thanks for waiting. Can I get some sweet tea? Also, that last guy was a jerk. Here!”
(She hands me the piece of paper. It says: ‘notalwaysright.com’.)
Customer: “If you need to feel better, then go here!”
(Thank you so much, miss! I had never heard of this site before today, and I’m so glad you were kind to me!)
