It Will Forever Be A Mister-ey

(A customer service agent is sending an email to another department for me. He is extremely slow and quite obviously an elderly man with poor hearing. My lunch break is almost over, so my patience is admittedly growing thin. I am a 31-year-old man.)

Agent: “Okay, so I am… writing him… an e-mail… for you. It says… ‘Ms. Smith called and—”

Me: “Mister.”

Agent: “Oh, uh, yes?”

Me: “Mister.”

Agent: “Yes, what can I do for you?”

Me: “No, it’s ‘Mister.'”

Agent: “Oh, you can just call me [Name].”

Me: “No, I’m not calling YOU ‘Mister.’ It’s ‘Mr. Smith.'”

Agent: “Right, ‘Ms. Smith called and’—”

Me: “No, it’s ‘MR. SMITH called,’ not ‘MS. SMITH called.'”

Agent: “Oh, I’m so sorry, Ms. Smith—I mean, Mr. Smith. Should I call you Mr. Smith?”

Me: “Just fix the e-mail please.”

Agent: “Okay so it goes ‘Ms. Smith called and’, oh wait, I should probably change that to Mr. Smith, shouldn’t I?”