Addicted To This Routine

(Our supermarket has a resident addict. Somewhere in there is a nice guy who made some very bad decisions some time ago. He is permanently off his face on whatever he can get his hands on. Some variant on this conversation takes place at least daily:)

Member Of Staff: “Right, [Addict], you’ll need to go. You’re barred, remember?”

Addict: “Am I? Why?”

Member Of Staff: “Because you keep trying to nick stuff.”

Addict: “Well, yes, I do, but I don’t remember being barred for it.”

Member Of Staff: “You were off your face at the time, so you probably wouldn’t, but you are. Trust me.”

Addict: “Well, if you say so. Will I remember this conversation tomorrow?”

Member Of Staff: “Probably not.”

Addict: “Right, well. I’ll see you tomorrow, then.” *leaves*