Aberdone With You

(My colleague has been on a call for a few minutes.)

Colleague: “I’ll just ask.” *to me* “How long does it take to get to Aberdeen?”

Me: “From where?”

Colleague: *blank stare before asking the caller* “Glasgow.”

Me: “By train or car?”

(Another blank stare before asking the caller.)

Colleague: “Car.”

Me: “About three hours, I think. I’ll check Google.”

Colleague: *shakes her head and addresses the caller* “About an hour.”

(I try to correct her, but she continues the call practically shouting over me.)

Me: *after hanging up* “Why did you say an hour?”

Colleague: “Because it takes about an hour to get to Edinburgh, and Aberdeen isn’t too far away.”

Me: “…”

(I had to pull out a map to show her how wrong her assumption was.)

Colleague: *realising* “Oh, I thought Aberdeen was there.”

Me: “That’s St. Andrews!”

Colleague: “Oh, well. Aberdeen, St. Andrews, it’s all the same!”

Me: “I think you should phone them back.”

Colleague: *scoffs* “No, it’ll be fine. She was just a nobody.”

(The “nobody” turned out being our new managing director, who was a little more than annoyed at finding out her journey was going to take three hours instead of one. My colleague tried to claim it was me who took the call, but I’m Irish while she is Scottish. I’m also male…)