Unfiltered Story #96657

My Dad owns a take out pizzeria that was started by his father – my grandfather. The pizzeria is named in honor of my grandfather, who, at the time of this story, had been dead for 35 years. I ordered pizza on a Friday evening, which is a really busy time, and when I got to the store the line was about 7 people long. Although I know the employees would let me cut to the front, I don’t like to do it because it makes other customers upset, so I just took my place in line behind a guy wearing a suit and started playing on my phone to pass the time.

Suit Guy: I can’t believe it’s taking so long. (to the person in front of him) How long have you been waiting? I’ve been waiting about 10 minutes now, this is crazy.

Customer in front of Suit Guy: Oh. I don’t know. I haven’t been keeping track.

Suit Guy: *aggressive* You should keep track! *he spins to face me* You! You just got in line, you should remember the exact time you got in line so you know how long it takes.

Me: *looking up from phone, kind of confused* Uh why?

Suit Guy: *straightens importantly* I’m going to report my wait time to the owner! You should too. This is crazy, this place used to run better.

Me: *makes eye contact with Cashier #1, who knows who I am and is trying not to laugh* I don’t think I’ll report my wait time to the owner. But thanks for the advice.

Suit Guy: Humpf! I’m a close personal friend of the owner, so I’m going to tell him about this the next time I see him!

Me: *looks closely at the guy’s face, just in case I should recognize him, I don’t, amused now* You’re close friends with (grandfather’s name)?

Suit Guy: *nods, pleased that someone seems to be impressed by him* Oh yes. For a long time. He won’t be happy when he hears how long I had to wait for a f****ing pizza! I’m telling him the next time I see him.

Me: *trades looks with Cashier 1 again, both of us are barely keeping in our laughter* Hopefully he’ll see that the wait time goes down in the future then.

Suit Guy: *nods a bit, pleased with this response*

We eventually get up to the front of the line, and one teller starts checking out Suit Guy while I go up to the other teller. Note that the tellers are about five feet apart on the same counter. I don’t pay for the pizza since my Dad gives me all free food, I just pick it up and start to walk away after a brief friendly conversation with Cashier 1.

Suit Guy: Hey hey wait! She didn’t pay for her pizza!

Me: *stops, getting a little annoyed now, the Cashier 2 speaks up before I figure out what I want to say*

Cashier 2: Oh, yeah, she’s the owner’s daughter. She doesn’t pay for food.

Suit Guy: *goes red, staring at me*

Me: Yeah, and hey, if you’re really going to talk to (grandfather) soon, can you ask him what heaven’s like? After you complain about the wait time of course.