Unfiltered Story #297513

(I’m in shared house situation – we all rent a room and we’re all strangers. The other three housemates are foreign nationals who are either learning or temporarily living in the UK and end up moving back to their country. Three new guys move in. I get approached by Guy #1 whilst I’m putting my food I’ve just bought away)

Guy #1: “I have an idea!”

Me: “Oh?”

Guy #1: “We should do a HOUSE shop!”

Me: “Erm, we do. For cleaning supplies and toilet paper… And washing liquid and stuff”

Guy #1: “No, a house grocery shop! Like, things we all eat and use! Like milk and butter… And… Erm. Bread! And, you know, staples!”

Me: “Not gonna work, I’m afraid.”

Guy #1: “Why not? It’s perfect!”

Me: “[Guy #2] is vegan, I’m lactose intolerant AND gluten intolerant and [Guy #3] is just… not here. Honestly kinda surprised that he even puts any money in the hard goods kitty”

Guy #1: “Oh, right.”